Orphanage Update

Hi everyone . . . so an update on my last few days. Since Sunday I have been going to the orphanage from about 8am - 4pm. It's a pretty long day and I'm both exhausted and DIRTY when I get home. So originally Happiness had told me that she wanted me to focus on cleaning up the storeroom. So first thing Monday morning Steven (storeroom manager) and I headed in and started to work. The storeroom is just a small room off the kitchen - and the kitchen is just a small cement room used to cook food over a wood fire. So the kitchen and the storeroom are very very smoky, and the storeroom is disgustingly dirty. The entire first day I was coughing and filthy and just generally annoyed. We got about 1/3 done but I was just dreading going back into that storeroom. Lucky for me, things have changed. So on Tuesday morning both Happiness and Steven were caught up in other activities at other locations, so I was forced to make myself useful with the kids and have been having a great time with them ever since. There are 13 boys and 6 girls. The youngest is a 14-month old baby that I spend a lot of time with. The children are pretty much scheduled all day and there are two teachers. Unfortunately the students are split by sex so one very unlucky new teacher has all 13 boys . . . and remember that all kids are under 7. I've been having a great and sad time just trying to love them. So usually I spend the morning with the baby. He came when he was one year old and at that point he had never made a sound, didn't have any hair, couldn't crawl and barely sat up. There is a marked change in him and he is definitely gaining ground, but he is still very small and he takes each meal like its his last. I also discovered this morning that he has ringworm so hopefully that can be treated soon. So I've spoiled him - the orphanage has a few Momas who do the cooking and cleaning and I can't be too critical, but they tend to get very lazy and can sometimes be mean to the kids. And really, childrearing is very different here. I rarely see babies cry or whine. It just doesnt happen. So when the baby whines or cries and the Mamas ignore it, it breaks my heart. I can usually gauge nap time so the baby and I are now in the habit of rocking (walking) him to sleep in my arms with his head on my heart. And we do it twice a day and the little guy can tell the second that he leaves my arms because he always starts crying. Another thing about him - they don't use diapers too often here because of the cost. So babies just wear clothes which means that once its wet, evrything has to be changed. It's kind of annoying and yesterday I got peed on about 3 1/2 times. Once the baby is down for a nap, I usually go play with the kids during their breaks or help out in class. It can be very heartbreaking. The girls, like most women in Tanzania, are strong, quiet and resilent. They will smile and touch my hand but otherwise stick to themselves. The boys, on the other hand, are interesting. It's sad because its obvious that some of these kids need more attention and love then they will ever get here. Some of the boys, when I touch them, almost curl up like little kittens, just begging to get hugged or kissed. One of the boys becomes almost maniac if someone else tries to touch me while he is touching me. He absolutely needs to feel like he has someone to himself - and thats impossible with 20 children. I try to spend a decent amount of time with him each day, just talking or swinging or holding hands. There is another little boy who honestly goes limp when touched, he just needs it so bad. There is a set of twin boys who remind me of my cousin Richard (its the nose and mischevious behavior) and they can be very rough sometimes. There is one little boy who is just off the charts mean and he never listens and always uses violence. Its impossible to blame them because they don't know any different and because no one has time to be just with them - but that doesnt make it any easier for the staff. One of my favorite times of the day is shower time, which takes place around 11am. The kids shower by sex, and the 'showerroom' is a cement room with no door and faucets that don't work. Buckets of water are brought in, and then 13 little boys come traipsing in their little towels. The first time I was in there I didn't know what to do - and yes, someone needs to be in there. Otherwise NO washing would ever get done. It's a freaking zoo. Little boys peeing everywhere, on my feet, showing me how far they can be, showing me what they pee with, comparing penises, touching, and generally just running around. I got used to the pee on my feet (since the babies pees all over the rest of me) but it is damn near impossible to get anything done. Usually one of the teachers has to come in and then wash each child. Today we worked in tandem, she washed and then sent them to me. I dried, put vasoline on the babies (under 3) and then dressed everyone. It was exhausting. Very little of the clothing is new or matches, so its a struggle to find the kids clothes that are clean, dont have holes, and look presentable. I also spend a lot of time trying to disciple, though that is impossible too. So many know only violence or hitting and in fact most of the Mamas threaten to 'beat' the kids when they don't listen. I spend a lot of my time drying tears and trying to stop fights. Its not that the kids don't like each other - moments after the fight they are back playing, but its just all they know. I've tried as best as I can to just focus on them and on loving them, but its discouraging to see how much they really need and to know how little they will really get - and that's not to say that they don't do a good job - they just dont have all the resources . . .
Okay, I have to go home to Rosy now. Its dinner in a few hours and I need to prepare for our usual argument where she tells me I didn't eat enough (after she puts enough food for 5 people in front of me) and I tell her that I ate too much. Ahhh the routines we fall into!
I hope everyone is doing well. Been catching the news and just find myself very lucky - madagascar has been having a lot of trouble since about 5 days after I left, and now it looks like there are some problems stirring up in Nairobi. Major protests and a student death yesterday related to the extra-judicial killings of some human rights workers in the middle of the city. I'm happy to be heading home - and when I go to Nairobi I'll go directly from the airport to the Chelangas house and then back the next morning . . .so no worries about me!
Love,
Ann